Untitled o3.

It's 7:53 in the fucking morning.
I've been up for....20 minutes?
Or so.
Yeah.
I've had a few thoughts about last night.



I thought back to when you said you were a mess.
Well.
Maybe, if you didn't keep it all hidden so damn well, you might be okay.
I know that's how I was.
And you remind me of myself my senior year of school.
But honestly.
Maybe if you'd open up, get it out, etc, you wouldn't be such a fucking wreck.
I don't know how bad it is, because you won't tell me anything, so...
Yeah.



Don't worry about what other people think.
Just let it go.
It'll make things better.
I think you keep it hidden because of the peer pressure of everyone liking you.
"Being famous."
Or whatever that crap is.
Fuck it, d00d.
Just be yourself.
Honestly.



Another thing I'd like to add is uhm.
I'm not sure you got that last IM I sent before you got kicked off.
"Don't duh me, because if i had any idea of what was in your mind, we wouldnt be having this conversation."
Yeah.
That set me off.
It's like you expect me to know everything.
You have to make things clear that are on your mind.
I can't read minds, you know.



And I didn't mean to get offline like I did.
I just couldn't do it.
I couldn't sit there and try to talk to you like everything was okay.
Well, it's sort of awkward.
And it hurts a hell of a lot.
...
I'm not sure what you expected.
This isn't like the other time you told me this.
Nothing had happened then.
But this time, it had.
I don't know what you were thinking, if you had your mind set that I'd be okay and things would go back to normal real quick like they did that time.
Even then, we were hardly close and it hurt.
I think you know what I'm feeling.
I'm damn sure you do.



I'm not sure what else to say right now.
I'm really just sitting here staring at nothing.
Things are running through my head so fast I can hear them.
I don't know what to stop on.
I don't know where to turn.
I'm not sure what to do with myself.



I'll just wait.
Wait for you.
Wait to live.
Wait to die.
Wait for something unknown.



Get yourself together, kid.
I need you.